Taking a Moment

I just wanted to admit how freaked out I am about the future.  Being on our own again after almost a year of non-stop help from my in-laws is a little scary.  Sometimes it makes it harder to feel like a good mom when I am not the one cooking dinner or watching my daughter during the days.  It will feel nice to atleast have some sense of having my own home again to lord over as supreme matriarch of my small family.  I want to bake some freaking cookies and plan a dinner out.  I want to run to the fridge in the middle of the night and grab ice without worrying about being too loud.  I want to make a mess and not worry about it coming across as being disrespectful.  Most of all, I don't want to wear a bra at home.  I want to run around after work in nasty pajamas without worrying that my post baby breasts are offensive to the other family members in the household.  We have been very lucky, but it is time to move on.  I am ready, now we just need to commit and make it happen.